In the many years of my age now 65 that I have actually been studying, writing, and learning from my own relationship failures, it is just in the previous dozen or so years that I have actually been included with couples counseling.
One thing I have seen with lots of couples, whether those couples are a guy and a female, 2 females, or 2 men, is that there is frequently a lack of real and significant interaction.
This absence of interaction triggers small conflicts to end up being heated arguments where problems are not fixed since both partners are trying to make their points and are not even listening to what the other person has to state.
Absolutely nothing can ever be solved when someone raises his/her voice with what only appears to the other individual to be demands.
Arguments – The losing side of a relationship:
The impact of this is that the other individual feels as if they are being scolded like moms and dad scold a kid and this triggers the person to close up in a protective posturing attitude where they do not trouble listening to what the other individual is stating.
This heightens the issue due to the fact that when the person who is relating the problem area in their life feels that they are being locked out, or overlooked, by their partner there is no meaningful dialog which permits a resolution to be attained.
The only resolution to the problem is for one or both partners to bring the topic up again, which may only create the same result.
Rather of being solved this issue now smolders like a hot ash, and this can produce an emotional forest fire!
The method I attempt to solve concerns like this is to teach couples how to discuss concerns rather of just screaming and having the entire situation developing into…
The Mental War of Relationship Struggles
There are numerous actions couples can take to have a great, open, and caring discussion, and to lower the friction in their relationship by learning to fix the really essential concerns that cause them to misinterpret each others feelings.
One of the most efficient actions I ask couples to consider is to express their anger, issues, irritations, and worries to their partner.
This permits them the freedom of opening up without the fear of confrontation. It is a really simple method, however has particular rules which should be followed.
One of the ways I relate to couples to do this is to encourage them to write a journal to document the problems in their relationship which they feel are triggering issues.
AHHH, Yes, Keeping a Journal!
While each partner reads their journal, the other partner can not disrupt, or make any comments.
This approach is not a fast repair for a distressed relationship, however most couples are amazed that after a number of months they are now working together to deal with the problems in their relationship.
One of the most complex interactions we deal with in life is the relationship with our partners.
There is frequently some initial stimulate which brings 2 individuals together, however for a relationship to prosper it requires compromise, communication, and cooperation.
This is just one of the tons of methods which can assist a couple’s willpower concerns.
However by teaching couples how to efficiently communicate, it helps to reinforce the foundations of their relationship.
One thing I have actually discovered with numerous couples, whether those couples are a lady and a guy, 2 ladies, or 2 males, is that there is frequently an absence of meaningful and genuine communication.
One of the most reliable steps I express is to express their anger, worries, concerns, and aggravations to their partner.
One of the ways I ask couples to do is to encourage them to write a journal to record the problems in their relationship which they feel are triggering problems.
This technique is not a quick fix for a struggling relationship, however many couples are amazed that after a number of months they are now working together to resolve the issues in their relationship.
This is only one of the many methods which can be used to assist relationship troubles and/or marital grief.
Again, I say but in a different way, however by teaching couples how to successfully interact, it helps to reinforce the structures of their relationship.