How to Build your Confidence with Positive Self-Talk

How to build your confidence sometimes is not as simple as waking up in the morning, brushing your hair, smiling in the mirror, and off to a great day. Well, for those of us who would like a little low self-esteem help and developing self-confidence, positive self-talk certainly helps

Good right-minded self-talk keeps the fearful and doubting ego-based aspect in us all to a minimum, and keeps your true Spirit in control of your destiny. 

While you are reviewing this piece keep in mind that the Course in Miracles states, “How bleak and despairing is the ego’s use of time! And how terrifying! For underneath its fanatical insistence that the past and future be the same is hidden a far more insidious threat to peace” 

Here are some simple ideas or food for thought that may help.

 ·       Highlight and talk about the positive. 

Be your own best teacher and friend.  

What do you tell a friend who’s tried something brand-new, whether it turned out well? At least you attempted something new-good for you! 

For building self-confidence be sure to emphasize the effort it took in doing something, rather than the final result.  

The secret is to accept that you have taken some action on objectives and goals, and this is how successful people grow.  

·       Tell yourself it is okay to take some risks. 

How to build your confidence means when you are about to start a new experience, be optimistic rather than investing your time stressing a lot about the outcome.

 It opens up the possibility of you ultimately being excellent at that something if you look at new things in your life as a chance to discover something. 

If you spend your time fearing the outcome, you’ll turn any chance there may have been into a failure.

 Exactly what’s more, we can’t begin building self-confidence when we are frozen with worry and fear of the future. Don’t set yourself as much as stop working.  

If you do, look at number one, once again! 

(Here’s more about how to develop self-confidence and self-worth and let go of a scarcity mentality for good!) 

 ·       Use positive self-talk to keep assumptions away. 

All of us use self-talk.  

The secret is to use positive self-talk in such a way that we don’t form bad ideas that can cause long-term doubts.  

This is why I always urge that you learn some form of mindfulness meditation, for going within and listening to the Spirit that knows what you should next, and a review article on that here… 

Catch yourself utilizing unfavorable self-talk and cancel it with something positive and not based upon assumptions! 

How to build your confidence means not anticipating perfection from yourself at all times. You can only do your best at something.  

Nobody can do everything completely perfect, so why do you presume that you should be able to?

 ·       Discover how to depend on your self-evaluation.

 If you always rely on the opinion of others rather than sticking to your own power of choice, you’ll constantly be wondering what they believe!  

That not does help in any form for building self-confidence—it tears it down, by giving away your individual power to others. 

The Course in Miracles teaches, “Yet what you do not realize, each time you choose, is that your choice is your evaluation of yourself.”

Concentrate on the genuine you, within, to learn how you feel about your very own actions, how you’ve been doing your job, etc.

You’ll be establishing a strong sense of who you are. It’s crucial to remember that nobody can be self-confident all of the time.

In reality, you’ll begin developing self-confidence quicker and easier as soon as your realize that. 


When it comes to how to build your confidence don’t set unrealistic expectations. Many people with low self-esteem or who do not have confidence are that way.  

They expect more from themselves than they do others. 

An individual with low self-esteem will think nothing about calling him or herself things like a ‘stupid idiot’ or a ‘knuckle head.’  

They wouldn’t dream of saying that to someone else. For how to build your confidence it’s a good idea to be your own trusted best friend. 

Always remember to capture yourself utilizing wrong-minded ego-based unfavorable self-talk.

When you do catch the ego trying to creep back in,  shine light with some right-minded positive outlook dialogue that is NOT based on assumptions! 

Again, do not expect perfection at all times.

Surely by all means do your best, but if a mistake occurs accept it as a lesson learned, and move forward on your objectives and goals.  

(Here’s a related article on negative thinking patterns being overcome by the power of presence. What is presence?) 

To building self-confidence, 

James Nussbaumer

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